WARNING: Gross images of my bloody eyeball in this post! Proceed with caution!

I’m used to people staring at my wonky eye. It’s once been mistaken for a glass eye (read that hilarious story here). But this was a new one. On Monday afternoon one of my sweet girls said

“Um… Mrs. Holdaway… I don’t want to interrupt… but I think your eye is bleeding?”

Imagine my surprise as I checked in the bathroom mirror after school to find this delightful image:

I had a headache all day but didn’t think much of it – I’m anemic and always have headaches. But this one was behind my now-bloody eyeball and seemed connected.

Tuesday I couldn’t get my contacts in so I had to wear my nerd glasses LIKE A CHUMP and the headache was worse, but I went to school anyway. The blood had started to travel and looked a little worse – now everyone was noticing at school. #awkward

Wednesday I took a sick day and went to see an eye doctor who was surprised I didn’t have some type of injury – punch, poke, accident, etc., to cause that much bloodiness. However, he said there was no damage to the surface of my eye and it should go away in a week or two.

A WEEK OR TWO. AWESOME. JUST IN TIME FOR HALLOWEEN. Zombies have bloody-ish eyes, don’t they? I guess that’ll be my costume.

So today I’m back at school and brainstorming things to say when my kids ask me why my eye looks like this:

• I listened to too much One Direction
• I stared at Facebook for too long
• This is what happens when you look directly into the sun for an hour
• I’m allergic to teenagers
• I KNEW I shouldn’t have eaten that school lunch!
• I walked into an Axe Bomb (when kids hold down the sprayer on their Axe Body Spray in the hallway in one spot so everyone walks through it and smells like a doosh the rest of the day)
• There’s an alien inside my brain
• Too much Call of Duty
• A kid asked to borrow another pencil and I just SNAPPED

What else, you guys? Help me brainstorm. I have at least another week of these questions to deflect.