A Junior High Witch Hunt

Ahhhh the funnest, sugariest, sluttiest, wildest holiday of the year! I love Halloween. I always have. I will dress up every year until I die. It’s so much fun!!

It’s especially fun to be in a junior high, because dressing up on campus or in a professional workplace is preeeeeeety awkward. I’ve learned a couple of things about teenagers and costumes.

They are incredibly morbid – tons of “Zipper Faces” and gory zombies today

You can gauge their maturity and projected future promiscuity based on their junior high costumes.

Non-slutty Avenger? You’re good.

Fairy Princess? Even better. No unplanned pregnancies for you.

Nurse (not in scrubs)? You’re treading on some dangerous ground.

French maid (Yes, I had one of these today in 8TH FREAKING GRADE)? Keep this girl away from anyone who owns a motorcycle.

Miley Cyrus (Wrecking Ball or Teddy Bear) – Take away everything spandex and get her with a counselor.

Today is the end of Term 1, we have tomorrow off and all the classes are shortened so we can have a dance at the end of the day from 1:45-2:50. So instead of moving on with Bunker Hill and the Declaration of Independence, we took a day off to backtrack and do the Salem Witch Trials.Junior High Teacher Costumes Witch

I started class by telling them I had chosen 3 kids in the class who were witches. Everyone else had to go ask questions, based on the information I gave them about what might make someone a witch, and find out who those 3 people would be. Correct guesses would merit a candy bar. But I hadn’t chosen anyone! Oh how quickly did these kids turn on eachother. They’ll pretty much kill someone for candy at school. I can’t imagine what they’d do for a Klondike Bar. Within 10 minutes we have half the class standing up at the front “on trial,” FREAKING OUT (one girl was almost in tears “But I SWEAR I am not a witch!!!”) before I revealed to them that actually none of them were picked as witches. Then we discussed the trails and I showed them this very interesting hypothesis:

In reality I spent most of the the time telling them to shut up, sit down, turn around, stop switching wigs, don’t choke him with his cape, stop use the n-word (weirdly Halloween really brings out the n-word using part of people?).

I ended class with making them all pinky promise me (yes, literally, because I’m 12 like that) that they’d be careful tonight. I may tease, make fun of and complain about these kids, but I love them with most of my heart. Most of the time. I pray for them every morning. I worry about them when I’m off duty. Halloween has me worrying about them because they are sometimes stupid and kids get hit by cars on Halloween every year. So I made them pinky promise. It made me feel a little better.

Stay tuned for updates on the amount of twerking at the dance, my after hours costume (not as slutty as it sounds sry) and The Beard’s costume! Hint: It’s a famous angry bearded man.

Happy Halloween!

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9 thoughts on “A Junior High Witch Hunt”

  • 10 years ago

    Best. Post. Ever! I love reading your blog, Danica. Don’t ever stop writing. 🙂 Miss you. And sorry I missed your birthday party.

  • 10 years ago

    you make me want to teach jr high! haha! Or at least start teaching dance again, I miss my students!

  • 10 years ago

    Sounds like a great way to teach. You are hilarious and awesome!

  • 10 years ago

    Love this. Have you seen that episode of Sabrina and the Salem Witch Trials? A lot like your experiment. (It’s fine that I love Sabrina, right?)

  • 10 years ago

    Love this post and I love the girl who was almost in tears about not being a witch. That would have been me in those days.

  • 10 years ago

    Also, my Senior Year, I went as a laundry basket on Halloween…. what does that say of me? HA!

  • 10 years ago

    Haha I love the future predictions 😉 Can’t wait to see your costume!
    Thanks for linking up! 🙂
    Jessi
    http://haircutandgeneralattitude.blogspot.com

  • […] said she wanted to hear more about what I’m doing with my kids in class, like when I did the Salem Witch Trials on Halloween. Often my day-to-day is kind of dull – Epic Rap Battles of History YouTube […]

  • […] at school I did the Salem Witch Trials, like I did last year, and it was just as awesome. One girl started crying out of frustration and a football player […]

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